50 Pounds Please! – A SAD STORY

When I lived in Hackney our corner shop was run by this sweet Indian couple. Whenever I would buy something I would go to the counter and hand it over and he would go “that is 50 pounds please” and I’d go “50 pounds? for a pack of gum??” and we would both laugh goodContinue reading “50 Pounds Please! – A SAD STORY”

Fall Girl in the Edinburgh Festival – AN ARTICLE

Have you ever been scammed? You must have. No? Ever thought you’d made a really good deal only to find out it’s quite the opposite? Or worse still, have a vague inkling that something isn’t right, that you may be part of a con, but in the face of smiling, cajoling strangers you find yourselfContinue reading “Fall Girl in the Edinburgh Festival – AN ARTICLE”

Fall Girl – AN ARTICLE

Last year, after months of rewrites and nerves being stretched and tested, my short comedy piece, ‘Never Better’ won The Sitcom Trials: So You Think You Write Funny? at the Gilded Balloon. The piece centred on a character I created called Hayley. Hayley is gullible, insecure and eager to please. In awkward situations she panicsContinue reading “Fall Girl – AN ARTICLE”

Lament of an Ill-Fitting Bra – A POEM

I was in huge distress (The girl in M&S Did not know what was best) She suggested Bs And suggested Ds For fluctuating breasts I left deflated My boobs felt fated To be oppressed for evermore By a steely cage That squeezed in rage And left them sad and sore Men will never know! TheContinue reading “Lament of an Ill-Fitting Bra – A POEM”

LANA DE-CAY- LYRICS REBOOT

LANA DEL RAY’s Born To Die – Lyrics reimagined as if she was singing about her love for Leatherface from Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Not too much of a stretch as all her songs are about submissive women to troubled men… Feet don’t fail me now Take me to the finish line You are chasing meContinue reading “LANA DE-CAY- LYRICS REBOOT”

A trip to a (slightly underwhelming) Wonder of the World. – A STORY OF MY HOLIDAY

On holiday in Turkey with my boyfriend Tom recently, I insisted we go on a day trip to see one of the Seventh wonders of the world. I mean, I argued, how often do we get a chance to see one of the Seven Wonders? There are only 7! Just 7! In the whole world!Continue reading “A trip to a (slightly underwhelming) Wonder of the World. – A STORY OF MY HOLIDAY”

An Actor Abroad (an entry from a journal of a very eccentric acting tour.)

We rattle along the roads; our merry band of actors. Set, costumes and personal luggage all sandwiched together, all creaking and wobbling dangerously, with the director at the helm. We eat the food we stole from a hotel breakfast buffet that morning and hold out for fake promises of toilet stops. The only toilet stopContinue reading “An Actor Abroad (an entry from a journal of a very eccentric acting tour.)”